So you’re training for a half marathon or a marathon and you know come the weekend, that long run has to be done. I as much as anyone have my routines and ultimately when I’m running have a few typical thoughts…
1. Okay cool I’m ready- shoes on, gels in hand, got my layers, playlist ready BOOM let’s go.
2. Lemme go to the toilet just in case.
3. Right that’s better. Oh wait need my watch.
4. Watch on, GPS found….ah do I need the toilet again or????
5. **goes to the toilet**
6. Great now I’m good to go…turn on NRC app…”3,2,1..beginning workout”.
7. Keep it easy first mile otherwise you’ll kill yourself.
8. **flies to first mile** 30 seconds quicker than I should be, great- I feel epic!
9. **hits mile 2** well that was an optimistic pace…umm so how long left?
10. If my keys could jingle quieter in my pocket, that’d be glorious.
11. Traffic lights are infuriating…GIMME GREEN MAN.
12. Crap didn’t pause my watch.
13. Ah well must run a smidge faster to up average time.
14. Can’t have a traffic light ruin my splits!
15. Why is it so hot, I thought it said minus degrees?
16. Never trust the weather 🙄
17. Why is my chest hot and my hands cold? I can’t deal with this body confusion.
18. Ah I love running into this park, so fresh!
19. Omg a dog!
20. ITS A PUPPY 😍
21. It’s running to me. Omg I wanna stroke it.
22. No Emma you are an adult, it’ll affect your time/pace, you must keep running.
23. **Stops to pet dog**
24. OH HIII AREN’T YOU ADDOORRABLLEEEEEE
25. **Dog runs straight past**
27. Well let’s run that awkwardness off.
28. Oh crap,not into that divot in the path.
29. **hits mile 6** YAAASSSS 10k in feeling splendid.
30. Gel time!
31. Now, to try to open zip without losing all pockets contents. Why are these so fiddly?
32. Keep eyes on road and pocket- don’t hit that lamp post. SWERVE.
33. Got it, blimey my hands are like Houdini 💁🏽
34. Mmmm sugar, GIMME!
35. Okay tooo much! Can’t swallow and breathe at the same time.
36. **panics** Don’t panic you’re a woman you can multitask.
37. Fuck it. **throws rest of gel away**
38. Anndddd relax.
39. **checks watch** oh not that much relaxation.
40. Oh look! Another runner they look friendly, smile should I?
41. No, maybe wave they look happy!
42. Here they come…
43. Oh ignored 😑 bloody Londoners.
44. Yes only 3 miles remaining- just a park run. I got this.
45. Bloody Nora, my legs are heavy.
46. And where did this sneaky hill come from and why is it sapping the life from me?
47. Home straight is in sight.
48. Channel that inner Mo.
49. Yes my legs are flying.
50. I am a unicorn riding the rainbow wave of freedom.
51. Still 0.12 of a mile to go.
52. Shit, went too fast too soon.
53. Must hold it.
54. Oooppps there’s the lactic. SOS.
55. 0.10 miles to go…ARE YOU ‘AVIN ME ON MATE?!
56. Phenomenal I see my house. The end is nigh.
57. Yes reached my door…wait still 0.02 miles to go!?
58. Must run last steps.
59. I could make my average time less if I smash this final 0.02, surely?
60. Channel your inner Bolt.
61. BOOOOM. I am the greatest human on the earth, run nailed, on a Sunday.
62. Nap time then Brunch time, SENSATIONAL!
63. Oh crap where are my keys..